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I love his "tough love" - because sometimes it's hard to see how much power we actually have, and because so many "gurus" are afraid to say the truth about men and relationships.If you've been frustrated and confused about why your relationships aren't working the way you want them to - this book will change your love life. And just as easily, it can spontaneously degenerate when the magic "just isn't there" anymore. Love is the attachment that results from deeply appreciating another's goodness. After all, most love stories don't feature a couple enraptured with each other's ethics. God created us to see ourselves as good (hence our need to either rationalize or regret our wrongdoings). Nice looks, an engaging personality, intelligence, and talent (all of which count for something) may attract you, but goodness is what moves you to love. Just focus on the good in another person (and everyone has some). I was once at an intimate concert in which the performer, a deeply spiritual person, gazed warmly at his audience and said, "I want you to know, I love you all." I smiled tolerantly and thought, "Sure." Looking back, though, I realize my cynicism was misplaced. Erich Fromm, in his famous treatise "The Art of Loving," noted the sad consequence of this misconception: "There is hardly any activity, any enterprise, which is started with such tremendous hopes and expectations, and yet, which fails so regularly, as love." (That was back in 1956 ― chances are he'd be even more pessimistic today.) So what is love ― real, lasting love? What we value most in ourselves, we value most in others. Love is that feeling you get when you meet the right person." Every hand went up. Judaism actually idealizes this universal, unconditional love. Consciously or unconsciously, they believe love is a sensation (based on physical and emotional attraction) that magically, spontaneously generates when Mr. If love comes from appreciating goodness, it needn't just happen ― you can make it happen. This man naturally saw the good in others, and our being there said enough about us that he could love us.

Obviously, there's a huge distance from here to the far more profound, personal love developed over the years, especially in marriage. Susan learned about this foundation of love after becoming engaged to David.We women have been sold the lie for so long that we have no power in relationships - and Evan turns that lie around and gives you your power back.He not only gives you your power back, he shows you exactly how to use it - and what's even MORE important, how NOT to use it.and observed that they did not crack at all" (Daniel Defoe).Contemplate implies looking attentively and thoughtfully: "It is interesting to contemplate an entangled bank, clothed with many plants" (Charles Darwin).




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He thought I was too young and needy, while I thought he lacked passion and didn't understand why he didn't want me to sleep over every night.


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